He is the Gift! The End!
Forgiveness isn’t the gift. Forgiveness allows me to have the real gift. The real gift isn’t a clear conscience free from guilt, the escape from hell, or anything of that nature. No forgiveness allows to me to have the real gift – God. God is the real gift.
So wrong about everything for so long. I missed it all these years. I wanted forgiveness so I wouldn’t be guilty, so I wouldn’t be condemned. I wanted Christ so I wouldn’t have to go to hell. I wanted leadership and ministry and all these things so I could have a good name in heaven. But none of these was what God ever wanted. God wanted me and He wanted me to just want Him.
Nate Saint, Jim Elliot and the others of the Five have been heroes of mine long before this movie. I saw their sacrifice as a great act of heroism. Some see it as tragedy. I prayed God would change their hearts. But mine also needed to be changed. It wasn’t about the act of heroism, or the honor of being a martyr that these men died. And even though their deaths were because of their great love for the lost, it was not and could not be the prime reason. It was that they were glad to know God and just had to share that gladness. It is the enjoyment of God and the irresistible desire to bring others into that gladness that God them killed. And the man who flew planes over Cuba, dropping Bibles. His plane crashed and he was imprisoned and tortured for twenty-four years. It was because he had the gift of God and just had to share Him with others.
Do I really have God? Do I have Him in my heart like that? I’m going to heaven. I’m forgiven for my sins. But is evangelism to me having such a completely intoxicating intimacy and love with God so much that He and He alone is the gift and everything else He provides (forgiveness included) is only a means to Himself. Seeking forgiveness or heaven as an end is meaningless. Forgiveness is the means of knowing God as the end. He is the gift.
And when mission and evangelism, and forgiveness, and calling, and leadership, and ministry, and…finally becomes in my heart all means to have that end, which is God, only then will I truly be ready to evangelize. It is not a concept, like math or grammar, that I am trying to communicate. It is a person - Jesus. They say His name, but their information about Him is all wrong. With me, it must be more than information. He must be real. He has to be.
“This is eternal life, that they may know You, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom You have sent.” John 17:3.
Oh God, give me a passion for nothing but You. Don’t give me a passion for evangelism or mission, or ministry or leadership, or love or life or anything. Give me one and single passion – for You. I want to know You, Lord. You and You alone. Amen.
Written on January 12, 2006
So wrong about everything for so long. I missed it all these years. I wanted forgiveness so I wouldn’t be guilty, so I wouldn’t be condemned. I wanted Christ so I wouldn’t have to go to hell. I wanted leadership and ministry and all these things so I could have a good name in heaven. But none of these was what God ever wanted. God wanted me and He wanted me to just want Him.
Nate Saint, Jim Elliot and the others of the Five have been heroes of mine long before this movie. I saw their sacrifice as a great act of heroism. Some see it as tragedy. I prayed God would change their hearts. But mine also needed to be changed. It wasn’t about the act of heroism, or the honor of being a martyr that these men died. And even though their deaths were because of their great love for the lost, it was not and could not be the prime reason. It was that they were glad to know God and just had to share that gladness. It is the enjoyment of God and the irresistible desire to bring others into that gladness that God them killed. And the man who flew planes over Cuba, dropping Bibles. His plane crashed and he was imprisoned and tortured for twenty-four years. It was because he had the gift of God and just had to share Him with others.
Do I really have God? Do I have Him in my heart like that? I’m going to heaven. I’m forgiven for my sins. But is evangelism to me having such a completely intoxicating intimacy and love with God so much that He and He alone is the gift and everything else He provides (forgiveness included) is only a means to Himself. Seeking forgiveness or heaven as an end is meaningless. Forgiveness is the means of knowing God as the end. He is the gift.
And when mission and evangelism, and forgiveness, and calling, and leadership, and ministry, and…finally becomes in my heart all means to have that end, which is God, only then will I truly be ready to evangelize. It is not a concept, like math or grammar, that I am trying to communicate. It is a person - Jesus. They say His name, but their information about Him is all wrong. With me, it must be more than information. He must be real. He has to be.
“This is eternal life, that they may know You, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom You have sent.” John 17:3.
Oh God, give me a passion for nothing but You. Don’t give me a passion for evangelism or mission, or ministry or leadership, or love or life or anything. Give me one and single passion – for You. I want to know You, Lord. You and You alone. Amen.
Written on January 12, 2006
posted by Ron | 6:56 AM
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